MAY 11 @ 5:35PM - OMEGA GIGA
One day, you will be Beowulf.
It is known that from the day of one's birth he or she wishes to become Beowulf. He is agile, buff, and slightly smart. Unfortunately, little Timmy and Alberta will have to put in a great effort if they want to reach their goal of transcending the heavenly planes of reality and becoming the Almighty Beowulf.
That being said, Timmy and Alberta will find it pleasurable to know that all the other Beowulfs will be visiting each one's home to consume their grandparents, respectively, which seem to be conveniently living with their children's children. (Alberta will also happen to be wearing a red hood that day.)
—To Timmy and Alberta—
DO NOT FEAR!
Not only will the ten Beowulfs find your grandparents to be of great taste, according to their tongues, but they will not stop at those old folk. Indeed, they will have you two for dessert.
Be patient for the last days of your lives befall you. When you are eaten, you will be made new as Beowulf. Thank you!